"Urgh, you don't even want to know what was in there. I'm sick of public toilets! They're disgusting and I hate them!"
"They're always turning the radios on full-blast and then leaving. ALWAYS. And there is ALWAYS a radio. Who the hell puts a radio in a bathroom, anyway?!"
"And I don't know about you two, but I'm bruised from sleeping on park benches night after night."
"Me too! We can't go on like this! How much money do we have?"
"27 dollars and some pocket lint."
"Is that enough to rent a hotel room?"
"It's not even enough to eat at a dive bar."
"What about a hostel?"
"I don't think so."
"We need more money! What can we do to get more money?!"
"Well, there's Feewa Foona Wabee AGAIN. Time to go before we all have aneurysms."
"You know, maybe we don't even need more money. Maybe we just need someone to stay with."
"What, you mean, like, we go into somebody's house and they put us up for free? That's a great idea! Why didn't you suggest it before?"
"The lights are on. Looks like we've found our host for the evening!"
"Hm. They sure are taking a long time to answer the door..."
"Stupid homeowners. We're tired and we want to sleep in a real bed tonight! How much longer is this going to take?"
"Hey, you morons, the lights are on! We know you're in there! Open up already!"
"Fine. Don't open up. See if I care."
"Um. What's he doing?"
"If you're going to ignore us I may as well do this!"
"I HOPE YOU LIKE CLEANING GARBAGE OFF YOUR PERFECTLY MANICURED LAWN, BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT YOU GET."
"That man is never going to get anywhere in life."
"No, he's not."
Will the stupid homeowners ever answer their door? Will our intrepid heroes get to sleep in a real bed, or will they be doomed to a lifetime of park benches? Tune in next post and find out!
Or, you know, don't. See if I care. Your lawn is looking a bit too well-manicured anyway.